The way most of us view, talk about and punish our bodies saddens the Angels very much. For the Angels, our bodies are moving miracles of form and function, and the dazzling diversity among us are the reflections of our unique aspect of the Source we all contain. The Angels are saddened to see the scars left by the suffering we inflict upon ourselves and each other.
But for many of us, it can feel like an uphill battle. I began this journey five years ago in an attempt to make peace with the fact that my body was changing, my diet was a mess and my exercise habits were nonexistent. I had done enough deep work that I understood that my habits were not simply the result of willful laziness - I was reacting to something, something that I could feel all around me and embedded in my bones.
I wanted to make changes, but I wanted to make changes for the right reasons, not because anything or anyone said I "should." The Angels gave me a reason I could embrace: to rejoice and celebrate this marvelous body with which I was blessed.
Please don't think that it's a perfect body according to current standards. No one is coming to photograph me wearing a bikini on my 52nd birthday - at least I hope they aren't. At 5-3 (and a half) and 150 lbs, I am, to say the least, a long way from the size 4 I used to be at the height (or should I say the depth) of my exercise obsession. I'm solid and strong and flexible. I weigh ten pounds less and I've adopted eating and exercise habits that keep me feeling good about how I am treating myself.
When I stopped treating my appetite like an unruly child and stopped banishing it from the room, and listened to what "it" really wanted, what it turned out I "really" wanted to eat were clean, local, organic foods. I found I preferred the taste of free-range eggs, for example, over their pale caged counterparts. When I stopped listening to the cultural messages that made "fat" a dirty word, I felt free to add what I knew to be healthy fats in healthy doses - enough to keep me satisfied for something that is as necessary to our well-being as sugar.
Feeling good about how I treat myself became my reason to make fundamental and serious changes to my diet and exercise habits. But even more importantly, it's helped me accept this new body that looks -at least to me - much different from the one I had what seems like just a few years ago.